Butterflies in the stomach

You know that feeling you get when you ‘love’ somebody and when they come close to you, your stomach just turns upside down and feels like butterflies are flattering in it. Magical! and the feeling is good! However, it is just a feeling. A feeling we get when there is sexual attraction or infatuation between people . The decision to love and be married to someone cannot be based on this feeling only.

What happens when you no longer feel the butterflies? Would you say you do not love the person any longer?
1 Corinthians 13:8 says that love never fails

But feelings do fail, they are unreliable. How we feel about something today may not be the same way we feel after some time. 

When relationships between men and women begin, most of the time there is a lot of chemistry and attraction that is accompanied by the ‘fireworks’. This feeling can be there for months and even years depending on how people relate. However, as time goes and a lot has been said and done, we may find that we do not quite feel the butterflies as often as we used to. We may end up not feeling them at all.

When the magical feeling decrease or stop, we should be able to continue loving our spouse. This is where the love of God in you comes in. When God is the third chord in your relationship, His love will sustain the relationship through tests and trials. His strength will help you go an extra mile.Most relationship are built on the basis of emotions more than on the Love and will of God. This is one of the reasons why some of our marriages crumble!

Take stock of your self and your relationship with your spouse.

 Are u both God filled? 

What holds you together and what constitutes the foundation of your relationship?

I am married to a God loving man. He is so hardworking and devoted to me and our children. His standard of life is very high and sometimes I come short and can not fulfill some things that he expects of me. On the other hand, I also have high expectations and he does fail at times but nonetheless, we have managed to work out our marriage and move past challenges. This is because from the onset we built our relationship upon the rock. The Lord God. I still pray that God continue to bind us together in his love.

My greatest desire is to see marriages that are genuinely God filled. Marriages that will survive the woes of the devil and raise Godly children who will take the church and the nation forward. 

The Order of God

 

What is Love (part 2)

The order of God

Our God is a God of order, 1 Corinthians 14:33. He does not do things haphazardly neither does He do them randomly. When God created the world, He had a plan. In addition, He executed each job on its day for six days. He created the world in an orderly manner.

In the previous post, I discussed about making God and His word the foundation for our relationships. I believe if He is the foundation in our lives then we ought to know and follow his order as well. God does not change and His word is sure.

What is God’s Order in the Home?

  • God
  • Husband
  • Wife
  • Children

1 Corinthians 11:3– But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

 

Ephesians 6:1-4

  1. Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honor thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise ; 3 That it may be well with thee, and thou may live long on the earth. 4 And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

Husbands and parents are to understand that biblical authority does not mean that they are dictatorial or tyrannical in their authority. Everything parents do should be in love. They are to die to themselves in order to do what is best for those under their authority. A husband is to help his wife grow in glory by loving her, leading her and lifting her with encouragement. The husband therefore should be equipped to be the priest of the home.

Ephesians 5:25-28

Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loves his wife loves himself.

I must say, it took me a long time to get this sunk into my head. I lacked understanding about submission. I still miss it here and there but I have allowed God to teach me and direct me.

A wife is be loyalty to her husband out of devotion. She is to adapt to the needs of her husband.  Submission has nothing to do with inferiority or superiority. It is an act of faith in God and his word. Regardless of what the other party does or says, the wife is to try her best to fulfill this part.

 

Ephesians 5:22-24

Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the savior of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.

 

Once the family is in order then the church will fall in place and the society respectively. Dysfunctional families give rise to a dysfunctional churches and societies. Now let us look at God’s order for the world. God is always at the top of the Hierarchy. He is our creator. All things work well in Him and without Him, we are lost.

  1. God
  2. Marriage
  3. Family
  4. Church (ministry)
  5. Government

This is God’s divine plan. It is simple and plain. Before God ever created the church, He created the family.  Before God ever created the family, He created the marriage.  Before God created anything, He was! Problems arise when we mix up the order of God. The enemy is always at work trying to make us mix it up.  It is so critical for you to understand God’s divine order.  So many people have destroyed their own lives because they did not understand God’s divine order.

At some point in my marriage, I found myself mixing up things. I sold myself out to church activities. It is good to do that do not get me wrong. However, in my case, I did this at the expense of my family and my marriage. I was not listening to what my husband had to say. I made him feel bad for even complaining just because it was church. There has to be a balance in all we do. God gives wisdom and directs our feet. If we have founded our marriages and relationships on him surely following his word would be easy.

 

P.S

Love Amede

 

Founded On LOVE!

What is love? (part 1)

Now there goes one of the most abused words ever. Sometimes underrated and sometimes overrated. We live in a world that is love-sick. so many awful things are done in the name of love. People kill each other and still claim they loved one another. It is sickening to the soul. It is confusing!

One man of God once preached about love and he said something that really stuck to my heart till date. When defining love he said love is a person. It immediately made sense to me. The bible describes God as love. God has a personality and so is love.

1 john 4:8

Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.

Just like God, Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. This is the record about love in the bible – 1 Corinthians 13:4-8

These are all the qualities that a person with love should portray. For one to be able to extent love it means they should first have it themselves. They should have God.

we cannot give what we do not have. God is the one who can teach us love more than anyone because He is love Himself. We must first believe in Him and accept Him as Lord over our lives. Then as we build a relationship with him, we will learn love as he continues to love us. Truly if we all had God and His kind of love, the world would be a better place. We cannot kill each other if we loved each other with the love of God.

Now imagine the kind of marriages the world would enjoy if they were built on the foundation of love. With God as the third chord. Am not just talking about a trial and error or baseless relationship between us and God. But a genuine heartfelt relationship where we wholeheartedly depend on God and what His word says about us and how we are to relate to one another. Regardless of the situations we would go through, with God in our marriages surely we would overcome and sail through all challenges we come across.

The divorce rate even for Christian couples is very alarming. Some marriage were just founded on the wrong things, it could be material things, money, power, pity you name it.  As long as the foundation of that marriage or relationship is not strong it will crumble.

With God as the third chord in our marriages, we need to follow his order or design for it because He is the one who ordained marriage and has the blue print for it.

NB: I will go in detail about the Order of God in part 2 of this article.

In most cases we lose it the moment we let our relationship with God go down. There will immediately be an opening or chance for the devil to creep in and mislead us. When we disregard the word of God over our lives, we start to regard someone else’ word.  In most cases what the world says. there is so much misleading information circulating in the world about so many thing. Too many opinions. but we cannot rely on such or base our relationships on it. The word of God is the only sure thing we have to use as a  foundation for our marriages and relationships on because it does not change.

Psalms 19:7-8

The law of the Lord is perfect, converting the soul; The testimony of the Lord is sure, making wise the simple;  The statutes of the Lord are right, rejoicing the heart; The commandment of the Lord is pure, enlightening the eyes 

It is time we trusted the one who created us. Trust Him with our all. He will not lead us astray.

 

P. S

Love Amede

 

 

 

 

First blog post

I want to take this opportunity to introduce myself. my official name is Portia Amede, but you will notice I introduce myself as Love Amede most of the times. Well that is just because I want to answer to a name that corresponds to what my heart yearns for. A name that will also remind me of what I carry and what I should share with the world.

I am a 30-year-old lady from Botswana. I am a Proud wife and mother of two. Growing up, I was raised by a single parent (my mother) together with my brothers. I had my first child as a teenager. it came with its challenges which I will share in the future. As I grew into a young lady, my eyes opened to a lot of things especially those about family and marriage life. The marriages of people around me screamed for help. I saw how most relationships were built on the wrong foundations.

After I got married, I began to yearn for a change. I wanted to be part of that change. I have a vision for godly marriages. godly families and relationships that are founded on God. So this is a platform for me to share with the world my views and prayers for marriages and families. I believe that the upcoming generations have to build the right foundation for marriage. This is not just something one learns a few months before they commit to marriage, but something to learn from a very young age.

So, lets open our hearts to receive wisdom.

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